Am I Dying? No Seriously…Am I?

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The first thing I think of when I hear the phrase “Lifetime Achievement Award” is the word…dead.  I mean that is typically an award one receives posthumously, right?  Seriously, who wants to receive a lifetime achievement award at 40?  Aren’t you pretty much just throwing in the white towel?  Nothing to see here folks, keep moving along, I got my lifetime achievement award so for the next 40-50 years I’m going to talk about my lifetime achievement award but never actually achieve anything else, because hello…I already got the award!  I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, and of course, I think I’m awesome and totally deserve such an honor, but I also spent many sleepless nights after I found out I would be receiving this award at the blogger equivalent of the Oscar’s worried that I was dying and no one had told me.

I’m being completely serious, every pimple was a potential tumor or cancerous cell (and really who still gets a zit at 40!) and I spent hours… HOURS… combing through WebMD and Google researching every symptom that I was convinced would lead to my untimely death.  I wish I could say that I was able to enjoy knowing that I was the recipient of such an honor, but I was too busy being firmly held down by terror’s grip that this meant my life was over.  So that lasted a few days, stealing my happiness and forcing me to suck the life out of everyone around me with my constant worry and fear.  Eventually, bigger fears took over, like what was I going to wear and would Adam Levine finally give me the acknowledgment I deserve and agree to be my date for this auspicious event.  I think my letter to him explaining the award I was to receive and my complete certainty that death was knocking on my door was quite convincing, so I wasn’t really concerned he would turn my offer down, but still…I had to keep the husband on standby.  Then I was hit with the worst fear of all, what would I say?!?!?!

And that my friend is the subject of this Super Secret Subject Swapapalooza submitted by the equally talented and hilarious Jenn over at Life On The Sonny Side.  Between you and me, I totally think she should have won.  Okay, not really, but that’s what I’m supposed to say…you know to be gracious and humble and all that crap, but who am I kidding?  I won a Lifetime Achievement Award; my days of humility are behind me.  There were a total of 15 brave bloggers that were considered equally deserving of this award, and my publicist is totally making me publish their links on my website, so you can scroll down if you absolutely must and check them out (between you and me, TOTALLY not worth it, but apparently SOME people think I’ve turned into some insane megalomaniac or something…whatevs, their just jealous of my success, so feel free to waste your time, but that’s why YOU don’t have this award sitting on your mantle with a spotlight shining on it).

Since I am such a consummate professional and perfectionist, I thought it best that I study past award acceptance speeches to help me cultivate my own.  I believe this turned out to be an invaluable resource and if I may brag for a moment, made my speech the best ever speech given at an award show ever in the history of award shows, but I’m sure I’m just being modest.    In case you missed the broadcast (because it was on some obscure cable channel); I have taken the time and trouble to provide the script to my speech here for your reading pleasure.  Enjoy and no need to thank me.

DRUMROLL PLEASE

“OMG I can’t believe I won!  I’m just so shocked.  OMG, I just LOVE YOU ALL!  I LOVE EVERYBODY!  I’m just speechless right now.  OMG I know there are people I need to thank, but I’m just feeling overwhelmed.  Can I take a minute?  (Audience laughter)  (A moment of carefully orchestrated uncontrollable sobbing by yours truly before I compose myself and bravely soldier onward)  Now I know what Roberto Benigni meant when he said he “would like to be Jupiter and kidnap everybody and take them to the firmament and make love to everybody.”  (Audience laughter) I get you Robby!  I totally get you now and life is indeed beautiful!  I’m so not prepared, I mean there are so many beautiful and talented bloggers in this category, and I just never thought I’d be standing up before you today, so I can’t even formulate a thought (insert nervous laughter followed by more uncontrollable sobbing).  I can’t seem to stop crying, I mean if you only knew what trials I’ve overcome to stand before you this night.  I’m such a little insignificant blogger; it is such an honor to be the recipient of such a prestigious award and held by so many distinguished bloggers before me.  I’m just a mom and a wife, yet here I am tonight standing before you in this dress supported by my amazing boyfriend (blows a kiss to Adam) and my equally amazing husband watching me now from our couch at home while he takes care of our 4 incredibly wonderful children.  I’m so blessed (pretty sobbing, not ugly girl cry face sobbing).  I don’t know what I did in my life to deserve all this; I’m just a girl from a small town in Texas who had a dream.  I love my family so much, without them I wouldn’t be standing here today.  I mean I am so in love with them, each and every one.  Don’t worry, you won’t catch me making out with my siblings or anything (ahem Angelina), but seriously, behind every great woman is a great supporting cast and network.  I’m so pumped that I could do a one arm push up right now!  (Audience laughter and clapping)  I feel like the queen of the world!  Woo hoo!!!!  (uncomfortable audience laughter?)  Speaking of Titanic, anyone else annoyed with the overuse of the names “Rose!” and “Jack!”  Seriously, go back and watch it.  You will be annoyed.  And I really don’t understand why she couldn’t have shared the door so the love of her life didn’t freeze to death and die…but I don’t want to digress (nervous tittering from me, I wasn’t really nervous, but I wanted to appear endearing).  I just think an award like this means I’m liked, and I am so happy to be liked and adored.  I feel like Mary Poppins!  I love all of you so much, and I wish everyone could win (puhleeze…who ever thinks that?)  Adam, darling!  Thank you so much for escorting me tonight.  Every blogger should be so lucky to have such delicious arm candy.  My husband!  Thank you so much for allowing Adam to escort me tonight, I wish you were here (not here here because…Adam)!  I’d like to thank my children who help provide the richly entertaining fodder that is my blog’s content.  But most of all, I would like to thank…ME.  (cue  music) No, let me explain…  (security forcibly gently drags escorts me offstage)”

Why shouldn’t I thank myself?  It’s my blog!  I write it!  Well, despite being so rudely shut down by the blogger award officials and their goon squad, I think we can all safely agree that this is the best award speech ever given.  I think the uncontrollable sobbing was well played.  I thought about going with hysterical over the top laughter, but crying won out in the end.  It was good right?  I mean you totally get why I won right?  Hahaha of course you do, who am I kidding 😉

If you are a blogger who struggles to figure out what to write, whether it be informative or amusing, worries about letting down his/her readers,  pat yourself on the back, you deserve it!  Keep keeping on!  Those of us who read you, need you!

And let me add this quick apology for being late to post today.  I can’t for the life of me figure out this timed posting thing, it never works, and by never I mean the two times I’ve tried it have been epic failures.  So to the other bloggers in the swap and to the amazing Karen at Baking In A Tornado, who takes the time out of her busy schedule to keep us entertained and on track and who comes up with some simply brilliant ideas for blog content (I’m a little bit sucking up because I was late but only a little bit), I apologize and I can’t wait to read you all!

Without further adieu, check out these fantastic peeps tweep and beeps (that means friends for you uncool unhip people).

http://www.BakingInATornado.com

http://chewylicious.wordpress.com

http://smn0409.blogspot.com

http://dinoheromommy.com

http://justalittlenutty.com

http://followmehome.shellybean.com

http://stacysewsandschools.wordpress.com

http://lifeonthesonnyside.blogspot.com

dates2diapers2.blogspot.com

http://www.tinystepsmommy.com

http://menopausalmother.blogspot.com

http://www.amotherlife.com

http://sadderbutwiser.wordpress.com

http://hypnoticbard.blogspot.com

Two Awards and a Bible

I asked my husband to throw a Bible at me.  Like literally.  I also told him not to miss and aim for my head.  Oh and I also asked if I could videotape it.

That look on your face right now….yeah, that’s the same look he wore.  I don’t get it.  Is my request that unreasonable?  Anyway, he said no.  Something about “desecration” and “sacrilege”…  I do wonder if I had suggested a dish or a Stephen King novel, if he would have complied with my request no questions asked.  If perhaps hitting me wasn’t the problem, but hitting me with a Bible was what he found offensive.  Hmmm.

You might be wondering what prompted my request in the first place.  Well, two things really.

  1. I won two awards recently
  2. Dina Lohan’s interview with Dr. Phil.

Whenever I win an award, I go a little “celebricrazy”.  I pretend the Paparazzi is following me, and let a boob hang out or forget to wear underwear.  I act all dramatic, which as it turns out isn’t really that hard for me.  I make my kids do weird things….I mean weirder than normal.  I coerce my husband into making sexy time videos or in this case hitting me with a Bible.

After finding out I had won two awards, I saw the interview Dina Lohan did with Dr. Phil where she accuses her ex-husband (Lindsay’s dad) of throwing a Bible at her head in a fit of rage on their honeymoon.  Color me stupid, but that might have been a sign to the both of them not only to NOT stay married, but to refrain from procreation as well.  Naturally, he denies this allegation.  He claims he’s punched her in the face before, but NEVER and I mean NEVER has he thrown a Bible at her head.  I don’t know about you, but I was so RELIEVED to hear that news!

Not to be outdone by the loony Lohan’s, I tried to stage my very own publicity stunt, but my selfish husband wouldn’t do something as simple as lob a Bible at my head, so here I am before you, accepting these awards like a….well, normal person, I guess.  Booooooooring.  I know.

The Versatile Blogger Award I received from Menopausal Mother.  I could play on her blog site forever.  She’s got this awesome heart cursor and every time you move it, it showers down little heart dust.  Adorable!  I know it seems like I’m on drugs, but this is just my personality…I promise.

As part of accepting this award, I have to mention 7 random things about myself.  This is going to be difficult, because obviously I LOVE hate talking about myself.

  1. I supported the Women’s Health Run 10 Feed 10 charity so I could get the tote bag.  It’s not that I don’t care about starving children, because I do!  And yes, technically, I was supposed to run 10 miles.  And I did download the training app, and I did open it…once, and I did donate.  But truth be told, I really just wanted the tote bag…so there’s that.

2.  I bite my nails.  I know it’s a disgusting habit.  The worst part, I throw my nail bits behind the couch.  Yikes!  Sorry honey….

3.  I sometimes use my husband’s razor to shave….indiscriminately.  And by indiscriminately, I mean any body part that might require shaving, I’m not picky about it….  I do this out of revenge, because he uses by body wash, my shaving cream, my shampoo and my body lotions…yeah he’s not at all girly….

4.  I talk to myself.  All the time.  I’ll even hold up my phone, or wear my bluetooth headset so it looks like I’m talking to someone, but really I’m just recreating a fight I had with someone or a conversation in which I wish I would have responded differently.  Don’t act like you’ve never done this….  Someone told me once, you’re only insane if when talking to yourself, you respond.  And I’ve never done that…I don’t think… (thinking)

5.  If I put something in my grocery cart and then decide later I don’t need it or want it, I hide it behind a bunch of crap depending on what aisle I’m in and it doesn’t matter if it’s cold or frozen or not.  Yeah…I’m THAT person.

6.  I once ate 4 boxes of Wintergreen Tic Tac’s in one sitting.  And by one sitting, I mean 5 minutes.  I can’t even let myself buy them anymore, my addiction is so great.

7.  I sometimes hide my husband’s things and then secretly laugh as he runs around the house trying to remember where he left them.  I’ll eventually “find” the missing item and then make him feel bad for being angry at losing it in the first place and taking that anger out on me.  I do this because of that one time he lost his car key and it cost us over $250 to replace it.  Never underestimate a women’s lust for revenge.  He’s gonna be so mad when he reads this, and now every time he loses something I’ll have completely lost my leverage, but it’s so worth it 😀  xoxo (for the record, I’ve only done it one or twice or maybe more….)  This is almost as fun as that time he thought he lost the bank card, and then found it like 2 weeks later (after we cancelled it and had the bank reissue a new one) under man-child’s pillow.  Where man-child had hidden it.  Apparently, this trait is hereditary.  Just harmless little pranks my love…honey?  honey?

Thank you so much Menopausal Mother for thinking of me!  I tried to come up with a really awesome acceptance speech.  The only one I could come up with was reminiscent of the speech Jack Palance gave when he won an Oscar and did that one-arm push up.  Yeah…I tried that and got tennis elbow.  Well, I didn’t actually try a one-arm push up…it was more like Downward Facing Dog, the Yoga position.  And I wasn’t doing it while accepting this award, it actually happened a couple of months ago, but I ignored the blinding pain in my elbow until I was convinced I had cancer, then I went to the doctor where he informed me it wasn’t broken…and THANK GOD because I totally would have walked around for 2 months with a BROKEN ARM, so thanks for that Dr. Stupid.  Anyway, now I can’t work out because everyone knows that even walking inflames tennis elbow, but I did get a 10 day supply of hyrdrocodone, and all you get is this crappy post.  That should be a t-shirt!  Which reminds me of the t-shirts my daughter’s homecoming group picked out…

Yes, I’m so proud.  It was in a very nice and respectable lime green color.  I think I’ve figured out why the mum’s are so big….  Yes, homecoming groups make t-shirts that they all wear in solidarity to school on Football Homecoming Day with the list of their names on the back.  My personal favorite of the year, might be the shirt with the picture of the Rubik’s Cube and the words “The more you play with it, the harder it gets” on it.  I could do a whole post about this phenomenon alone, but I have another award to accept!

I received The Laine Blogger Award from my esteemed bloggy friend Happy Little Feet.  I’ve told you to check her out before, if you haven’t, you really must do so now!  She’s awesome, fun, creative, talented and adorable!

In order to receive this award, I must answer 5 questions:

1.  What is your current beauty obsession?

 It probably should be Botox or liposuction, but sadly its hair removal.  Nothing glamorous like laser hair removal, just the old-fashioned plucking variety.  I’m sprouting hair where no one should find hair…ever.  My nipples sometimes look like the center of a sunflower, and I wish I was joking.  It happens overnight.  I think there is miracle-gro in my body lotion.  I’ll go to bed hair free and wake up looking like the Wooly Mammoth’s ugly sister.  It’s awful, I know.

2.  What is ONE item you wished you owned?

A t-shirt that Adam Levine has worn or slept in…not sweated in because “natural” smells don’t turn me on.  I want his cologne or after shave or body wash smell all saturated in it and I want to hide it under my pillow, like lavender, where I can smell it and it will help me sleep on those nights I’m plagued with insomnia.  Also, I might keep it in my underwear drawer during the day, like those potpourri satchel’s they sell in Victoria’s Secret.  That’s not weird or creepy?  Right?  I mean, I don’t come up with these questions!

3.  What is your favorite topic to read about?

I’m a whore for celebrity gossip.  I googled for the uncensored naked pics of Kate Middleton, and it was disappointing.  That poor girl needs a sandwich or a big bowl of pasta…every day.  I’m shameless in my quest for celebrity gossip.  I know it sounds like I’m bragging.  I’m not.  It’s my guilty pleasure.

4.  What inspired you to become a blogger? 

I carry around weird crap in my head, and it needed to get out.  I don’t really consider myself a blogger anyway.  My favorite thing is laughing.  At myself, at other people, at members of my family…I’m not discriminatory.  I think people take themselves way to seriously, especially some bloggers and parents, so I throw my lack of normalcy out there like spaghetti against a wall and see what sticks, and I try to have fun while doing it.

5.  What nail polish are you wearing now?

Speaking of random…  None.  I rarely paint my nails.  My husband thought I was trying some new fangled trick with polish on my toe nails, so he complimented the look, unsure what the proper etiquette should be when you aren’t sure about someone’s toe polish.  I assured him that no compliments were necessary.  The toe polish on my big toe’s only was from 4 months ago, and instead of taking it off with polish remover, I was just letting it grow out.  So, you want me now or later honey?

Thank you so much Happy Little Feet for thinking of me, and bestowing this award upon me.  I’m not sure what you see in my, but I’m glad you’re here!

Now, I’m supposed to nominate bloggers.  I never do what I’m told.  Instead, I’m going to provide links to the 5 funniest blogs I’ve read this week.  Pour yourself a glass of wine and prepare to snort it out your nose in laughter.  I hope you enjoy these bloggers as much as I do.

Momaical and The Running of the Squirrels

Let Me Start By Saying…My Little Pony: A Whore, A Secret & A Kimono’s Worst Nightmare

Frugalistablogdotcom’s Sky Rockets in Flight…afternoon delight

Sorry Kid, Your Mom Doesn’t Play Well With Others and the Redneck Wedding

Sticky Situation by The Bearded Iris and Parenting with Crappy Pictures

Versatility is My Middle Name!

A few weeks ago I won The Versatile Blogger Award from two very fabulous bloggers.  I hope they didn’t think I forgot about them, or that I didn’t appreciate the honor they took the time to bestow upon me.  I’ll reveal the names of my esteemed bloggy friends a bit later.  First, I wanted to get a handle on what it meant to be coined as “versatile”.

Perhaps, I got this award after my award-winning performance in the unauthorized release of the “sexy time” video starring my husband and me.  Sure, it was a tad awkward when our little home movie was played in front of our son’s first grade class.  As soon as I’m allowed within a 2 mile radius, I will apologize.  In the meantime, I might need some homeschooling advice.  For those mom’s who wrote me the hate mail, my son is fine.  We get a therapy “the 4th child is free” discount.  Besides, we used black and white film and everyone knows that makes it artsy, not pornographic.  It’s not like I paid someone to release it (people do it for free…can you believe it?)  I think I showed tremendous versatility and grace in dealing with the whole messy situation.

When Perez Hilton compared my video to a National Geographic special on the mating habits of the Wildebeest….did I get upset?  No.  Jealous people say mean things.  It comes with the fame.  One must be versatile when dealing with haters.  One must adapt to living in the unforgiving glare of the spotlight.

That one mom who blogged the nasty article about me, totally overreacted when her toddler accidentally got the “money shot” while I was getting out of my car.  I mean, I think we can all agree that underwear is soooooooo restrictive.  And we all know if my name were “Britney Spears,” she would have whipped out that camera phone and sold the pics to US Weekly to pay for little Bobby’s private school education!  So please spare me the hypocritical outrage.  In other news, did you know baby beavers were so cute?

I have to keep this blog G or PG rated for my blogging challenge.  What could be more G-rated than posting cute pics of baby animals!  I’m versatile enough to talk about anything, even beavers.

Versatility is the ability to do many things competently.

  1. I can poop and read.  What?  Where else do I get alone time to catch up on blogs? Even then, peace and quiet isn’t always guaranteed. My husband waits till I sit on my porcelain throne before putting the laundry away and then makes retching and gagging sounds the whole time.  Sometimes I get poop fright, and if I know someone is listening, I freeze up.  On second thought, maybe not so versatile.
  2. Nothing screams versatility like plucking random upper lip hair while brushing my teeth.  Am I wrong?
  3. I can read tweets while giving the appearance that I’m listening to my husband’s boring work stories.  Although, I probably need to work on that particular skill because even though my husband has worked for the same company for over 20 years, I still couldn’t really tell you what he does exactly.
  4. I can smile at you sweetly while mentally plotting all manner of horrible things.  That looks way worse written down than it sounded in my head.
  5. I can listen to my iPod and nap at the same time.  I might have narcolepsy (that is the falling asleep thing, not the sexy time with dead people thing right because that would be really gross and not at all what I mean).  Or maybe I have a tapeworm.  Do tapeworms make you sleepy?  I need to google that later when I’m not so tired.

I think I’ve clearly proven my mastery in the Art of Versatility.  It is with great honor that I accept the two Versatile Blogger awards I received from Making Things Happen and Earth2Body Sisters (who also posts under My Life As Lucy).  These ladies are awesome and you totally need to go check them out.  Unless you hate happiness, laughter, smoothies, drinking skeletons. headless chickens, conversation vomit (an affliction I suffer from acutely), cool crafts and nifty recipes.  Would I lie to you?  Previous content notwithstanding….

Okay, so one of the rules to this award is to list 7 random facts about yourself.

  1. I absolutely cannot wear socks on carpet.  It grosses me out.
  2. I hide all my paperwork in a filing cabinet, so my office looks clean and organized.
  3. I can’t poop in public places.  I will hold it until I get home, and then it’s a mad rush to the bathroom, and heaven help anyone who stands in my way!
  4. I’m really shy but hide it by being obnoxious and sarcastic
  5. I can cry on command.  It’s my party trick.
  6. I can say my ABC’s backwards, drunk or sober.
  7. I added African Safari to my bucket list.

I’m supposed to now nominate 15 bloggers that I adore and admire.  It’s late and I’m tired.  I’m not sure if I’m actually writing this or dreaming that I am writing it.  Instead, I am going to troll some blog hops and try to find 15 new bloggers to follow!  I promise to share my findings.  If you are really bored, you can read my other award nominations:

Nick Nolte or Gary Busey…Wait What’s the Question?

Why You’re Just A Freakin’ Ball Of Sunshine!

Sisterhoods and Sex Tapes

***WARNING:  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.***

Nick Nolte or Gary Busey…Wait What’s the Question?

I was nominated for two awards this week!!!  For those of you counting, and let’s face it, everyone does…that makes a total of THREE awards for me!  Yay, I did the math.  Right?  On September 19th, I was awarded The Liebster from my new friend Viola Fury.  Getting nominated for two awards this week took the sting out of not winning a spot in Blogger Idol and realizing that my dreams of being the writer version of a rock star were not going to come true.  And I bedazzled my leather pants and everything…oh well *puts tube top and feather boa back in closet*.  Did I mention I was practicing my 80’s hair?  It’s all about finding the perfect combination of tease and spray.  Never underestimate the power of the backcomb.  Enough about Blogger Idol, this is my moment!  My award!  Back to me!  My favorite subject.
Speaking of me…I’m a little concerned all these awards are going to my head.  Here’s why:
  1. I carry around a little bell to summon my progeny (it doesn’t work on husbands come to find out, but shrilly bellowing works nicely in a pinch).
  2. After a stranger hit my grocery cart with her grocery cart, I replied “I’ll give you my autograph, you don’t need to take such drastic measures” (this may or may not have actually happened, but either way…I am clearly putting the Prima in Donna).
  3. I locked myself in a dressing room for two hours aka Amanda Bynes-style, but I was actually sobbing because I’m pretty sure my muffin top has exceeded the weight capacity required to still be considered just a muffin top.
  4. I pre-ordered an iPhone 5.
  5. I got mad when they expected me to pay for it…hello don’t they know who I am!
  6. When I accidentally hit a pedestrian, I was insulted they didn’t make a bigger deal about it.  I know I’m not Lindsay Lohan, but come on! (no one was hurt in this “alleged” incident).
  7. When I named dropped Duracell earlier in twitter, I fully expected a lifetime supply…wth?
  8. I walked around the house topless, and I was actually disappointed I didn’t end up in a tabloid the next day.
  9. I’m drinking more and showing up at inappropriate places wearing my pajamas (I mean let’s face it, that look is fine for Walmart, but Target…umm no)
  10. I’m Adam Levine’s secret girlfriend…duh

Of course, I am a little concerned about the darker side of fame.  I could end up looking like this guy:

I mean he’s won all sorts of Awards and nominations, right?  Whatever happened to Nick Nolte anyway?  Is he still alive?  I always get him confused with Gary Busey.
Pretty sure my kids have been on the receiving end of a face very similar to this one.
Anyway, I digress.  Back to my award and hopefully if I start turning into Nick Nolte or Gary Busey someone will ship me off to Dr. Drew.  Just make sure I’m heavily airbrushed and they use that Barbara Walters soft camera lighting on me, okay?  Okay.
I might actually be drunk right now.  I’ve been doing shots of Nyquil.  In the daytime.  I like to live on the edge.
Okay, so really now…back to my award.  I’m going to answer some questions and then nominate some of my faves!  Don’t feel pressured to respond if you do get nominated, just know that I enjoy you!

1. What is your favorite color?

I don’t know if I’d consider it my favorite color but I wear quite a bit of black.  I hear it’s slimming.  After 2 hours locked in a fitting room trying on black “skinny” jeans, I beg to differ.

2. Your life is going to become a script for a movie. Who would you want to play you?

I have a huge girl crush on Jennifer Garner.  I think she could pull me off.  If she wore a fat suit.

3. Coffee or tea?

I don’t function without coffee, but I’m also a southern girl and LOVE  my sweet tea!  I also take my coffee sweet, as in tons of sweetener and creamer.  It hardly resembles coffee when I’m done, more like a dessert.

4. Not counting family…what do you feel your greatest accomplishment is so far in life?

Um.  Huh.  I’ve always pretty much defined myself as a mother.  And up until this question, I would have said getting my oldest daughter to 18 without getting pregnant or doing a stint in rehab was my greatest accomplishment to date.  Huh.  I’m stumped.  Stymied.  I once spent an entire day watching nothing but True Blood.  Does that count?  Oh, I know, I jogged the other day.  To the mailbox.  I was winded, that should count.  Yeah, I got nothing.  I think raising these tiny people is the only accomplishment for which I want to be known.  On my tombstone it should read “She didn’t raise assholes”.

5. Book or movie?

Book, most definitely, hands down, no question.

6. What was your favorite childhood toy?

Probably Barbies.  I mean it’s the one thing I actually remember playing with way past the age I should have been playing with them.  My favorite childhood memories of my sister and I center around playing with Barbie.  Her memories might not be as fond.  She always got tricked into playing with the “ugly” Barbie.  You know the one with only one foot because the dog gnawed off the other one.  Or the Barbie whose leg won’t stay on.  Or the Barbie we played Beauty Salon with and now she’s sporting a sassy new “do”.  And there was that one Barbie we tried to make a brunette by using rust spray.  I told her everyone loved a villain.  It was waaaaaaay better playing the “bad” Barbie, than the pretty, goody two-shoes Barbie with the fabulous clothes, 5 story house and married to GI Joe.  Ah…fun times.

7. Did you have an imaginary friend as a child? If you did, what was its name? If you didn’t, what would you have named it?

Yes, I did have imaginary friends.  I don’t remember if they had names, but they did have voices.  I would give each friend a different voice, because how else could I differentiate among them…duh.  My parent’s would have friends over and they would think I was having a slumber party.  Could be disturbing, could be imaginative…I’ll let you decide.

8. Favorite season?

I love Winter and I love Fall.  I can’t choose between them, it wouldn’t be fair.

9. Did you play sports in school? What were they? If not, do you regret not playing sports?

lol… Reading should be a sport.

10. Dvd or Blu-ray?

I’m a gadget whore.  I love buying the newest “it” gadget.  To be honest, I can’t tell the difference, but Blu-ray is the clear choice here.

11. You get to become a villain for a day from a Disney movie. Which villain are you?

Ooooh, good question.  I mostly resemble Ursula from The Little Mermaid (you know…physically).  I loved Hades from Hercules, and James Woods just has an awesome voice, so I’d probably say Hades.  Plus, I’m pretty sure there are moments when living with me is like living in one of Dante’s Circles.  So Hades is an appropriate choice.

I read all sorts of different blogs, some of you may not even know I read you.  I wish there were more hours in a day to spend reading.  I have blogger moods, one day I might need to find the funny, other days I might be feeling crafty.

So, the AT&T store called and my pre-ordered phone has arrived, so I have to run.  Priorities.  No time for spell check, be kind.

Here is my list of nominees for The Liebster Award:

Figuring it Out as we Grow

ThisHappyMom

My Life and Kids

The Random Blogette

Craughing

Cassandra’s Corner

I Want a Dumpster Baby

Red Vines and Red Wine

Life’s too short to play possum!

25ToFly